Parenting coach gives advice on navigating your children's friendships

July 17, 2026 - 14:27

Summer is here, and for many kids that means a sudden shift from structured school days to long, unstructured hours of freedom. With that freedom comes more play dates, more sleepovers, and more time spent navigating the sometimes tricky waters of friendship. For parents, this can be a season of both relief and anxiety. How do you support your child's social life without hovering? How do you handle the inevitable conflicts or the child who seems to be a bad influence?

A parenting coach suggests that the first step is to shift your mindset from manager to consultant. Instead of arranging every play date or stepping in to solve every argument, let your child take the lead. Ask open-ended questions like, "What do you like about playing with that friend?" or "How did it feel when they said that?" This builds their emotional vocabulary and problem-solving skills.

The coach also warns against labeling other children as "bad kids." Instead, focus on specific behaviors. If your child comes home upset, talk about the action, not the person. Say, "It sounds like it hurt your feelings when they took your toy without asking," rather than, "They are a mean kid." This teaches your child to set boundaries and recognize healthy versus unhealthy dynamics.

Finally, remember that summer is a low-stakes practice ground. Not every friendship will last, and that is okay. The goal is not to curate a perfect social circle for your child, but to give them the tools to build their own. Let them experience small disappointments and small victories. Your job is to be a safe place to land, not the pilot of the plane.